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Episode 521 (Apr. 6, 2004)
                                       Check it out, I'm learning
                       ,,,              ,   contact juggling.
                       '..            OO o
                       .||.          oo))'
        _______________ || __________ d d _____________



                                    o
                                       Crap.
                       ,,,        o    ,
                       '..          \OO
                       .||.        p//- o
                    ___ || ________ d _____


                                         ,- o
                                     `  /
                       ,,,          *donk*
                       '..             #O   \
                       .||.          -//-    o
               ________ || _________ dd _o________


 OK, now I see why it's
called -contact- juggling.
                      `,,,
                       '..
                        ||                pp
jg_____________________ || ________________\\__o___o_o____

420 of 635, average rating 0.6923. (91 votes)
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Episode 522 (Apr. 8, 2004)
 I've filled easter eggs with
 candy and hidden them! Let's
  go on an easter egg hunt!                ,,,
,--------------.         `OO        ..~    ..'    ==~
|`-.____________`-.      -||-      .<<.   .||.   .[[.
|__|_____________||______ bb ______ || ___ || ___ || __________


                    Maybe not. Last year you hid them in
                    the medieval England of an alternate
                   dimension! They were impossible to find!
                                   `       ,,,
,--------------.          OO        --~    ..'    ==~
|`-.____________`-.      .||.      .<<.   .||.   .[[.
|__|_____________||______ bb ______ || ___ || ___ || ______


                  Fine! I'll find them and      Fine!
                  eat all the candy myself!       `       ,,,
,--------------.          `OO                      ~..    '..   ~==
|`-.____________`-.      -//-                      ->>     ||    ]]
jg_|_____________||______ bb ______________________ |\ ___ |\ __ |\ ___



                   Killjoys.
      _             ,
,-. ,' `. ,------ OO ----.
   \_ ,^.\|`-.___((_______`-.
____)>`-(_|__|____bb_______||

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Episode 523 (Apr. 11, 2004)
When I throw this switch,                     _________ ___________
 you will drop into the               What? Hang on!   V           |
 acid bath and PERISH!                 How the heck    |           |
                   `,,_               did I get here?  |           |
                    "oO                             `OO|           |
                  /-//                                ==    (   o  |
_________________A_ || ___________________   o        dd     )     |
                                          |~~~~'~~~~~~~~~~o~~~~~~~~|



                                              _________ ___________
You mean to say that you've        It's kind of hazy,  V           |
 forgotten how I defeated          yes. I'd appreciate |           |
  and humiliated you?  `,,_            a quick recap.  |     O     |
                        "oO                         `OO|           |
                  /     //                     o      ==           |
_________________A_____ |\ _______________            dd        (  |
                                          |~~~~~~~~~"~~~~~~~~~~~~~~|



                                              _________ ___________
       Well, I guess I -could- put                     V           |
        off your execution for a        Your kindness  |           |
          -little- while. `,,_          overwhelms me. |           |
                           "oO                      `OO|        o  |
                  /       .//                  )      ==           |
_________________A________ || ____________    (       dd     o     |
jg                                        |~~~~~~~%~~~~~~~~~~~~~o~~|

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Episode 524 (Apr. 13, 2004)
  Well, the first part of my plan
  to kidnap and destroy you was to
  hack into IBM's secret research
  files concerning killer robots!           ______
                     ` _,,         Naturally.|    |
                       oO"                `OO|    |
                /       \\.                 ==    |
           ____A_______ /| _____________    dd    |
                                        |~~~~~~~~~|


                         , - -  -  -  - -   -  -  -   - -  -  -  - .
And then I constructed  .   _______              Go forth and KILL! .
an army of robots that   `  :::::::::..                   `_,,       .
captured and killed you! .   '............                 Oo"        .
   ,,_ ,              , '     | - - - - - - -              -\\-       .
   "oO               .          | == == == == ==        ___ || _     ,
  -//-               .          ' [] [] [] [] []       /        `.   .
__ || ______________  ` .         |\ |\ |\ |\ |\    _.'           \   '
                          ` . _  _ _  _  _   _  _   _   _  _ _  _ _ .'


                                They didn't kill me
                               though; I'm right here.
                Shush! It's called       |  ______
                poetic license! `,,_     |   |    |
                                 "Oo      `OO|    |
                /               .//-        ==    |
_______________A________________ || ____    dd    |
jg                                      |~~~~~~~~~|

307 of 635, average rating 0.7619. (84 votes)
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Episode 525 (Apr. 15, 2004)
                                    ___________
 ...and that's how          You forgot |       |
 I totally defeated         something. |   . , |
 and captured you. `,,_             `OO|   -*- |
                    "Oo               ==   ' ` |
            /      .//.            (  dd    o  |
___________A_______ || __________   )          |
                                 |~~~~~~~~~o~~~|

---------------------------------------------.   . .
 You're forgetting the virus I wrote when I  | '     ` - - .  .
 discovered that your robots were controlled |,- -- --- -- ---.  ` - .'
 centrally. Your entire army was wiped out.  ((( (  (   )  ) )))      .
---------------------------------------------'`--._  ` '  _,--'       .
 '                          \        ,             ' `.' '
  `    `  ,     ?!     .   `  .  |  /      -' -    :  .  :       '    .
  .' -*boom*-   ==       -   ` '      ,'           :  :  :     )      .
 '      []      []           ( *pow* )       ,     | |:| |            .
:   ___ || ____ || _    _,   ,`-   -   `         ,' '   ` `.     `    ,
 ` . _  _ _                 '        \   -  .   ( *kabooom* )
            ` - - -  - - . _ _  _ _  _  _ _  _  _  _ _ _  _ _  . .. -'

                                    ___________
  Which is why you're       Right you  |       |
  suspended above the         are. `_,,|       |
   acid bath, not me.               oO"|       |
                   `OO               =='    '  |
            /      .||-               ||     ) |
___________A_______ bb __________ '      o  (  |
jg                               |~"~~~~~~~~~~~|

561 of 635, average rating 0.5800. (100 votes)
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Episode 526 (Apr. 18, 2004)
  Hey, ever wonder why             No. Please shut up.
  people have knees? `              ,
                      OO          --~
                     ((          .<<.
                   _ b b ________ || ___



    See, -that's- why there's        Ugh.
     no cure for cancer yet.         ,
                          `OO     ''~
                          //-    .<<.
                 ________ bb ____ || _____



    People aren't inquisitive       They're just not inquisitive about
        enough, that's why!          ,   meaningless crap like you.
                         `OO      --~
                         -||-     <<
               __________ bb ____ || __________




          Are you calling me        No I meant.. OK,
          meaningless crap?         ,  yeah I am.
                         `OO      ..~
                          ||     .<<.
jg                        bb      ||

588 of 635, average rating 0.5377. (106 votes)
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Episode 527 (Apr. 20, 2004)
                            Heh, my lvl 14 won't stand a chance against
                               the alien invasion in City of Heroes.
        Level 14?! You were in      |
         the closed beta?       Yeah. Since March.
                       `,,,         ,
                        '..       OO
                        .||.       ))
        ________________ || _____ d d __________________


 You mean you've played           Well, there was a non-disclosure
the City of Heroes beta for      thingy, and besides, I thought you
weeks and not told me? `,,,       ,    were in the beta too!
                        'oo     OO
                        -||-   -||.
            ____________ || ___ dd _______________


           Why would you          You said something about
           think that? `,,,       , doing something secret
                        'oo     OO   too, what was that?
                        .||.   -||-
                ________ || ___ dd ________


              Clog dancing.
                       `,,,
                        ',,     Oo
                         ||     ||
jg                       ||     dd

540 of 635, average rating 0.6000. (105 votes)
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Episode 528 (Apr. 22, 2004)
I heard diamonds are forever, so       That's the stupidest
 I'm changing my name to Ever.        thing I've ever heard.
                 `,,,                 ,
                  '~~               OO
                   ||              .||.
__________________ |\ _____________ dd ____



               It was a joke!        It was a stupid joke,
                          `,,,        , you're stupid. Oh,
                           '..      OO   and I need to ask
                           .||.    .||.    you something.
       ____________________ || ____ dd ______



       Why ask me? You just          Well sometimes the world is
       said I'm -stupid-. `,,,        ,  a stupid place, and you
                           '--      OO    need to be stupid to
                           -||-    .||>  properly understand it.
                   ________ || ____ dd ________


  I wish you could just once
  say something nice about me
  that -isn't- an insult. `,,,
                           '--      OO
                            ||     .||.
jg                          ||      dd

504 of 635, average rating 0.6364. (88 votes)
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Episode 529 (Apr. 25, 2004)
 If nothing is as it seems,
is -it- as -nothing- seems?       What?
                     `            ,
                      OO        --~
                     ((        .<<.
                   _ b b ______ || ____________________



 If nothing beats love, is
-love- worse than -nothing-?
                     `OO        ..~
                     .||.      .<<.
               ______ bb ______ || _______________



    If you're all that,           Did you just call
    is -all that- -you-?           ,   me fat?
                     `OO        ..~
                     <||.      .<<.
            _________ bb ______ || ___________



         Uhh.. No, of           That hesitation just bought you a
         course not. `           ,   vacation in Painsville.
                      OO      --~
                      ||     -<<.
jg                    bb      /|

620 of 635, average rating 0.4640. (125 votes)
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Episode 530 (Apr. 27, 2004)
            Hey, you're              What?! Of
             not dead?              course not!
                   `___               ,
                   ()..)            ..~
                    ||-            .<<.
              _____ |\ ____________ || _________________________


Hm. I could've sworn the             Whuh?
 world was coming to  `___            ,
   an end just now.   (''()         ''~
                      .||.         .<<.
       _______________ || _________ || ____________


   Oh well. Maybe tomorrow
    then. See you later!
                      `___          ?!
                      ()~~)         oo~
                      `||.          <<
           ___________ || _________ || ______


            ,'|
      _    | o'
     |    o'
    o'   ___ *whistle*
        (..()                       oo~
          ||                        <<
jg        /|                        ||

327 of 635, average rating 0.7500. (100 votes)
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Copyright © 2001-2005 Joaquim Gândara. Fan art copyright © their respective owners.